Meditation and Grilled Cheese

The past few days have been really hard. Lots of crying about the divorce. As much as my logical side tells me to calm down, that things are the way they are for good reasons, I can't help but start thinking horrible things like "no man will ever love me," and "I failed." One way I keep my emotions stable is meditating, sometimes on my own, and sometimes with a guided meditation video like this one.

The other way to center myself is, of course, cooking. Not to be confused with stress eating, I find it healthier to deeply involve myself in the nuances of food-making instead of acting on my despair in self-destructive ways. Today, instead of drinking alone or being woeful at my decreasingly-patient friends, I made a sandwich. The idea to make said sandwich followed this tongue-in-cheek post from yesterday, called 31 Grilled Cheeses That Are Better Than a Boyfriend. Looking at those pictures, I was inspired to drive to the grocery store immediately, with 50% visibility while it was raining tiny ice pellets, because I felt I needed to make a grilled cheese as soon as possible.


Darn it, Buzzfeed, look what you made me do.

Anyway, here's the story of my grilled cheese. It's sort of a combination of #12 and #13 from that list- I feel that despite minor differences, the spirit of my sandwich is the same.

Cyn's 'No More Tears' Grilled Cheese with Avocados & Peppers

Ingredients:

• 8 slices of bread (I used Pain de campagne)
• 6-8 oz monterey jack cheese, sliced
• 2 ripe avocados, sliced
• 2 jalapeño peppers, finely chopped w/seeds removed to taste
• 1 large red bell pepper, finely chopped
• 4 tbsp olive oil (divided between cooking and the bread)
• 1/2 tsp cumin
• salt & pepper to taste

Preparation:
Put about 1 tbsp of olive oil in a frying pan over medium heat, and add the red pepper. Cook for about 2 1/2 minutes, occasionally stirring, then add the chopped jalapeño and cumin, and continue cooking for another 3 minutes, or until the peppers are fragrant. Season with salt, and pepper, stir, and remove from heat.

I made a conscious decision to use finely chopped peppers (like a salsa) instead of roasting halved jalapeños. Why? Because the skin of the jalapenos I bought were kind of tough, and it gets messy biting into a sandwich and having some of the bite stay attached.



Drizzle or brush the remaining olive oil on the outside surfaces of the bread slices to help them grill to perfection. Assemble the ingredients as follows: cheese slices first, then the peppers, then top with avocado slices. Add another dash of salt and pepper on top of the avocado to season. You can easily grill the sandwiches the traditional way in a skillet or grill pan, but I wanted to try out a new kitchen gadget in my arsenal that a friend of the family gave me for Christmas- a sandwich press:


Impressive... Most impressive.

Press (or grill in a pan) for 1 1/2 to 2 minutes, or until the cheese is melted, and the bread is fried to your desired color. The ingredients as I listed them would make 4 (really filling) sandwiches.


"I will stop the flow of your tears, and your arteries."

This is one of those recipes where it doesn't matter if you follow it to the letter. It's near impossible to mess up anything involving cheese and avocados, and you can take massive liberties adding or switching out ingredients. If you make a grilled cheese of your own, leave me a comment!